value 2 & 3

I can’t wait to go back to KL once my grade 12 was done. To just get away from all the bullying and the culture shock. I was looking forward so much to go back and be back with my buddies. Things however seems a bit difference when I went back home. Family is still the same but my friends are a bit different now. Whenever we sit down together, they beginning talking events that occur while I was not there which is perfectly normal. Life moves on and we are all growing up.  

Since its only 6 months, luckily I still manage to slip myself into their topic but it is also ever so easy I got slip out of their topic and sight.

It took me two months to finally blend back in with my friends. I’m finally happy. It was like old times, the happy feeling is back. We would go to movies, play soccer, had dinners together and just hang out together. it was of great fun. However September finally came and I have no choice but to go back to Canada. 

I almost cry not wanting to leave but my manly ego stop me from doing so. How silly of a man crying because of his friends. i brought this up to my family and end up got yelled at for being immature. Then there's the pressure from relatives. I didn't question much, nor do i know how to do any questioning too during that time. 

I finally left KL.This time round, I’m not staying in a city like Toronto but Winnipeg, a city with only 600,000 population.  I’m not staying in a campus where food is ever so ready make but in an apartment which mean i have to cook my own food!! I was 18 then. There's no bed, no chair, no nothing. Just me and my luggage. 

Due to me mixing with bad friends during my first 6 months in Toronto, my dad put restriction on my pocket money this time round. The money was so tight, it is only enough for me to buy stupid bread, rice and a month of instant noodles. I resort to food banks, churches and mosques for food. I stick around all kind of events in my university for food. I don't even care if people start calling me cheap bastard for that. I need to eat to survive. The first few months was hell to me. 

This is when I learn the true meaning of survival.

Not wanting to miss out on what happen with my friends back in kl, I spend the next 4 months playing catch up with them via internet. I spend so much time playing catch up that i neglect my studies again. I realize during this 4 months too that no matter how hard to i try to play catch up, i'm still missing out because i was not there. December rolls in and our first semester examination comes with it too.

I never give it much thought for I thought I can handle it like how I handle my SPM with friends studying together. I laze around, eat out a lot and give myself excuse by not studying because “I need to adapt to the new city”

With examination around the corner and it is then that I realize nobody willing to help me out. My new friends just keep giving me answers such as i should look it up in the library instead of asking them. my request were all shot down. I gave it a last minute revision with feeling that the exam won’t be hard but how wrong and naïve I was. It was tough. Of the 5 courses (subjects) that I took, I failed 2.

I gasp

This is when I learn what consequence laziness can cause.